We killed it last night, such a good time.
I saw so many people i love, rad DJ, marching band and i almost punched the body guard in the face and yelled ” DONT FUCK WITH A FEMINIST” i think that was my frist time really identifying myself as one out loud, soo das cool.
CLIQUE CLIQUE CLIQUE CLIQUE
I hate to say it but i totally have high expectations for this vacation. My mother and i deserve it. After the last 11 months we had we deserve a small 5 day vacation away from reality. I am so proud of how far we have come, I feel like we are both starting to live & enjoy life again, finally. I had never really dealt with depression before August of 2011, I had (for the most part) a “normal” child hood. So with the sudden death of my father,(to put it lightly) it felt like my world had fallen apart. life was handed to me on a silver platter, i had just graduated college and was preparing myself for the “real world” and then tragedy hit and it hit me very, very hard. I didn’t see anyone aside from a handful of close friends/family for months. I would spend my days working and smoking pot because i didn’t want to feel anything. Normal dating and socializing became out of the question. These overwhelming feelings of, sadness, anger, hate, self loathing, and helplessness fell over me. It wasn’t until i hit rock bottom that i began to pick myself back up. I finally feel like ive let it all go, ive come to terms with the cards that have been dealt.
I’m sorry im rambling i just felt like i needed to let this all out before i leave for Cancun (in 2 hours!). I want to come back and look at it as a fresh start. I made a list of “22 Goals before i turn 22” and i plan on completing all of them. See you in 5 days!
feels like someone is punching me in the stomach over and over.
this pain is unbearable the only way i’m going to sleep is if i get up and smoke.
but then ill probably sleep until noon.
i feel so disconnected from the world today.
still nursing my slight hangover, anyone wanna skype i’m bored.
we can swap jokes and stories of past lovers.
Modern day dating is such a drag.
Via moms iPad (Taken with instagram)
And she dances like the ocean, by candlelight.
Monday morning’s usual post: “my weekend via mobile uploads”
my hair is being soo rad and cooperating wonderfully today.
Working this beautiful day away,
what a shame jcrew owns my soul for the next 10 days.
its my day off and ill drink from the bottle if i wanna.
Waiting for Vanessa to come over and making us pancakes.
Kitties are for lovers